One of the wisest things I’ve learned in the last 90 days is to judge your progress based on where you’ve been, not where you want to be.
If that’s how I’m going to do things, then I want to let you know that I’m doing great!
Things around here look a lot different than they did 3 months ago. When we got here, Max had never been in a carseat, and Milo couldn’t stand to be in one. To go anywhere I had it sit in the back seat wedged between the two car seats, trying to comfort and distract each kid in turn. Including nursing them. Don’t try to picture how this is possible.
I was also nursing both kids to sleep every night (one of whom, ahem, at 4 years old, felt like a meat-grinder). And in the middle of the night. Both in my bed.
Milo was prone to explosions and trusted no one. I was his everything.
My mom and I were so exhausted that we were asleep by 8pm every night.
Fast forward to now.
Each of the kids is in preschool/daycare, one right next door to each other. We walk the two blocks from our house together each day.
In the car, they each sit in their own car seats in the back, and I sit in front. In the person-sized passenger seat.
They each go to sleep without nursing. My mom puts Max down in his crib with a lovey (stuffed animal) to go to sleep. Milo and I listen to Beatrix Potter audiobooks while he lays in his own bed (not in my room) and falls asleep. They’re each asleep by 8pm.
It gets better. Sometimes, my mom watches a football game after the kids go to sleep. I have started to read books before bed. I’ve even caught up on an email or two. Things are looking up, up, up.
Looking back to 90 days ago, how were things for you? How far have you come? I’m betting all the struggle seems worth it now. I learned this idea in The GAP And The GAIN, by Dan Sullivan (and Dr. Benjamin Hardy).
Thank You Everyone For Your Supportive Comments
When I posted a couple of months ago about my situation, I received over 200 emails and comments sharing love and support. It was incredible. I thought somehow that I was going to be able to answer them all, like I usually try to do, but I haven’t been able to.
So I’m sending a huge thank you to everyone who responded. Many of you shared details about difficult and/or abusive situations that you were familiar with. All of you encouraged me to move forward and not look back. Thank you, each of you.
Love,
Liat
25 comments
Debi Humphrey
Hi, Liat!
I’m just now getting to read your February post; I hadn’t seen it till now. I absolutely LOVE the picture of Milo in the reflecting puddle (BTW, I’ve been watching your photos; you’re getting really good at photography!). And the one of Max sleeping on the floor. Kids remind us to live in the moment, don’t they?
I’m SUPER happy that y’all are doing so much better. I’ve actually thought of you several times and wondered how you were doing.
I just lost my beloved husband in November, 2023. I miss him so much, it’s like a physical pain. But your words give me hope that things will get better with time.
I think you’re an AWESOME mom and wish you and yours all the best life has to offer.
Debi Humphrey
Liat Gat - Founder
Hi Debi,
Thank you so much for your beautiful comment! That makes me so happy that you read my post and liked the photos. I love hearing from you about this, even though I wrote it a while ago. Thank you so much for thinking of me and wondering how I’m doing. I would love to write another update post but then I look at my to-do list and go, “maybe another time!” I’ve taken tons of fun photos since then. I did study an iphone photography course, by the way, that’s why my photos have improved! (https://iphonephotographyschool.com/) If you check out the link, don’t go for all the extra courses they try to get you to buy. The basic course is the best.
I am so sorry to hear about your husband’s passing in 2023. That was so recently!! It sounds like you had a loving relationship like what most people dream about. That gives me hope.
Hugs,
Liat
Allison Maus
I’m so happy you and the kids and your awesome mom are getting better and better. You deserve the best.
Allison
Carol Fleming
Liat, I have not visited your blog or site in quite some time. I think Max was just a small baby the last time I checked in. Obviously there have been some changes in your life. If I am “reading the room” then you and husband are no longer together for some reason, but it looks like you and the boys are doing well. I have always enjoyed your blogs and pictures and have purchased classes from time to time. Good luck to you in the future. I believe you are a strong, resilient woman. (and a good knitter!) Carol
Liat Gat - Founder
Hi Carol,
Thank you so much for stopping by! Yes you are right. Not sure if you saw this post but here I explain just a bit that I moved: https://new.knitfreedom.com/blog/liat-transition/
I really appreciate that you came by and commented. Cheers,
Liat
Joan C Wood
Liat,
Great to hear from you, Everyone looks wonderful and your Mother must be thrilled to have you home. So glad you’re in a better place and the boys are adjusting to daycare and preschool. Be sure to take care of yourself as well. Will keep you in my prayers. Love Joan
Kawaii433
Omgosh Liat, your children look sooo much like you. They are adorable. <3 I'm sorry I haven't been around much but I stopped knitting for awhile but will soon get back to it. Always thinking of you and your family. Big hugs and wishing you continued happiness.
Kawaii aka Lain
Liat Gat - Founder
Hello Kawaii, it’s so wonderful to hear from you! Thank you for this. Big hugs to you too. Thank you for your continued support.
Liat
robin
i guess i need to be more careful about proofreading – things – not thinks
robin
thank you for the photos and the update – so glad to hear thinks are up – years ago a friend had a mantra – “every day in every way things are getting better and better” – you are the proof
Liat Gat - Founder
Aw, Robin, thank you so much for this. The positivity I am encountering in the responses to my update is just life-affirming. I so appreciate you taking a moment to share your friend’s mantra. I love it.
Cheers,
Liat
Sally
Thanks, Liat, for taking the time so send an update on how you, the boys, and your mom are transitioning. Your mindfulness and appreciation are highlighted by your words and photos. Be well!
Liat Gat - Founder
Thank you so very much Sally! It was wonderful to find a moment and some memorable photos to write a new blog post. Sharing my life in this way with you and the other KnitFreedom readers makes each little challenge much more meaningful. And will be something nice for me and us to look back on when we are on to new and different challenges. Certainly at each stage as the kids grow I find myself sure that “This stage is definitely the hardest!” Ha.
Love,
Liat
Merrill
Liat, you deserve all the good you are getting in life now. I’m so very happy for you and your wonderful family.
Liat Gat - Founder
Merrill, thank you so much for your note and your support. I treasure your words.
Liat
Lilian
Liat, I’m so happy for you I can’t find the words to express it. It takes me back to similar times in my life. I wish you all the very best!!
P.S. the boys look soo gorgeous!!
Liat Gat - Founder
Hi Lilian,
Thank you so much! I am sorry to hear you have gone through something similar, but I am encouraged by your words and the people who have traveled this path before me. And thank you for your sweet words about my babies 😍
Liat
Myrna Pouyatt
So, so glad to get this email. You have been on my mind and in my prayers. The boys are getting big and they are so adorable! Thank you for the update, I wish you the best life has to offer, you are an awesome knitting instructor. Love your videos. There is no one like you, you’re the best!
Liat Gat - Founder
Hi Myrna,
Thank you for your comment! It is so wonderful to hear from you. You’ve been part of KnitFreedom since the very beginning! Thank you so much for your continued support and positive words.
Love,
Liat
Naomi Griffiths
So wonderful to hear from you with your good news in your transition. Kids are resilient and yours are beautiful and growing so well. Keep up with us when you can. You are blessed.
Liat Gat - Founder
Hi Naomi,
It’s fabulous to hear from you! I really appreciate your positive message. I know this transition is quite tough on Milo, he often asks to go back to Mexico and his dad. I always treat his requests with empathy and tell him we will try to work out what’s best for all of us, step by step.
Hugs,
Liat
Bobbie
YAYYY, Liat! SO happy to see all the smiling faces (including yours) and learn the transition process is going very well! That was a cool reflection picture of Milo! Milo and Max are growing up so fast! That’s awesome to see Milo can write his name and enjoys books! You and your mom are such positive role models for your sons. I have a quote you will like. My grandmother used to say this and lived her life by this, and I think of her often. She passed away in 1982 (before my second son was born) and was also a good role model. It goes like this: “Look up, not down; out, not in; forward, not backward; and lend a hand.” Keep on doing what you’re doing, and your boys will be forever grateful. Bobbie 😊
Liat Gat - Founder
Hi Bobbie,
Thank you so much for your wonderful note! I love your grandmother’s saying. I so appreciate your support and your positive words. I am happy about the reflection photo, several many people have commented on it! I appreciate you and you helping me look to the long-term benefits of this tough choice. And it is tough, but as I think about it now, the situation we came from was much tougher.
Grateful for you,
Liat
Joani Frenette-Cornell
Dear Awesome Person and Mother,
I salute you! so glad you have such wonderful support!
Thank you for sharing your experience!
Joani
Liat Gat - Founder
Hi Joani,
Aw, this is so sweet! Thank you, I am so grateful for my mom, without her we would be in shambles. Thank you for your encouraging words.
Hugs,
Liat